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Sunday, December 22, 2013

(NSFW) Tales of Infinite Mischief Episode 2 Part 2

"Who are you, and why can I hear you without an earpiece?" the Arbite questioned.
"I am Inquisitor McDowell, and I had drafted each of you to be my Acolytes," she exclaimed, "Each of you have skills that could be put to great use as part of the Inquisition, and it is easier to exert control over you because you have no choice in the matter.
Jax Arkana, you have death warrants on your head for 37 different planets.  Wolfe Arkana, you were convicted of heresy for attacking Arbites in 15 different sub-sectors."
"I will exercise their punishment then," the Arbite piped up.  He whipped his pistol at Jax's head.  A laspistol and lascannon pointed back at his.
"I wouldn't try that if I were you, twinkle toes," Wolfe said.
"You mess with one Arkana, you mess with all Arkanas," Millard added.  All four of them collapse as if they were shocked.
"As you can see, I took the liberty of having shock collars surgically installed in each of you; along with your left eyes and ears so I can see and hear everything that ya'll are doing."  She released the four from the shock effect.
After a moment of composing himself, the Arbite asked, "What gives you the Emperor-given right to..."  He gets shocked again.
"I am an Inquisitor; that gives me the right."
"Why am I here then?"
"Because Cpt. Titus Harlock, I need an Acolyte that can blend in with the well-off of society.  Your family has connections to the Imperial Guard, planetary governors in their debt.  And, you are very easy to blackmail into coercion."
"That's all well-and-good for them, but I haven't done anything to warrant the Inquisition's attention; and I haven't committed any heresy.  So, why I am here?" the tech-priest questioned.
"You were easy to acquire Midkiff.  You were about to kicked out and executed by the Machine Cult for the crime of trying to have sex with a heavy bolter."  Everyone else has their eyes pop open at that suggestion.
"That is completely untrue, for one thing, the barrel on that thing was too small to do anything with."
Garvel waves his hands in a vain attempt to repel that thought.  "If we're done with all of that, can we focus on the task at hand?  Umm, what is our assignment here Inquisitor?"
"I was going to have you all investigate the possibility of the Hive Governor going heretical, but circumstance has forced my hand.  The uprising started at the behest of the Hive Governor; killing millions of the Emperor's loyal subjects before the day was out.  The Arbitrators in the hive were killed to the last person.  Even the Vatarian XI Regiment could do little against them.  But, the Dark Eldar took advantage of the situation and slaughtered the regiment.  Now, the Blood Angels are here to purge the hive city.  And the Steel Nightmares have shown up within the last three weeks.
Simply put, your new mission is to kill the Hive Governor for his crime against the Imperium."
"I will execute the heretic myself," Titus said through gritted teeth.  The Inquisitor decided that was a good enough reason to stop shocking him.  When he recovered, he straightened out his uniform.  "How are we going to get out of here now."
"We can try to get a Valkyrie working," Jax replied.  He looked to the tech-priest to see if it was possible.
"I'll have to check the condition of them both to see if it can be done," he stated.  Grim started rummaging through the remains with assistance from Garvel and Wolfe.  Jax heard something approaching and reacted quickly enough to avoid splinter pistol fire.
Two Dark Eldar Helions flew through the area; one nearly off Tybalt's head.  Those who weren't preoccupied fired back.  Millard's lascannon shot blew up one of the gliders, and the Helion tumbled into a vat of molten metal.  The other swung back around leaped at Jax.  It backhanded him unconscious before another shot from Millard took its head off.
Jax took awhile to wake up and went immediately to swiping the dead guy's weapons.  Wolfe joined the action, scavenging a splinter rifle for himself.  A crackle of static from the radio of the kill-team caught everyone's attention.
...orces are to withdraw....hive-city within twelve hours...lood Angel strike crui...level the whol..........Imperial forces are......twelve hours.
"Robot, we need to get out of here, soon!" Titus exclaimed.
"I am not a robot you imbecile, I am a tech-priest of Mars.  And I can get this thing working if you jackasses would actually do something," Grim stated.
Everybody leapt into action, except for Titus, trying to fix the damage one of the Valkyries had sustained.  Grim directed the project whenever he wasn't busy himself.  Five hours later, the Valkyrie looked better than new; and they stripped the other of any parts that could be taken, including gun emplacements.
Grim did a test to see if the gunship was still air worthy before letting the others stow the spare parts and guns on it.  Jax approached the cockpit, sat down in one of the seats, and tried to grab the flight stick in front of him.  Grim quickly slapped his hands away and yelled, "ONLY I CAN TOUCH KAREN'S CONTROLS RIGHT NOW!"
"Karen?  Who's Karen?"
"She is the Valkyrie.  She gave permission only to me to fly her."  Jax slammed the door behind him.  "I think the tech-priest wants to fuck the gunship."
"Of course he does; he's a robot," Titus interjected.
"I AM NOT A ROBOT YOU WITLESS BABOON!"
The Valkyrie lifted up towards the hole in the ceiling.  They a scene of mass carnage when they got beyond the slums.  Cultists and dregs butchering innocent people while Dark Eldar and Imperial Guardsman fire indiscriminately into the crowds.  Blood Angels leapt high in the sky above it all as their bolters tore everything apart down below.
Engines flared up to propel the gunship away from the scene; Helions pursuing close behind.  Wolfe and Millard man the guns on the sides and open fire on their pursuers; Jax ran to the cockpit and jumped on the vox.  "Any friendly imperial units, this is General Jax Arkana of the Vatarian 3rd Regiment; we have Dark Eldar all around us and we need support."
"This is Captain Tycho of the Blood Angels 3rd Company, what is your business here General?"
"We're here for the Hive Governor."
"Anyone who is trying to protect the traitor will die with him."  Hunters and Stalkers fired on the Valkyrie.  Missiles streaked past and shells exploded all around.
"Hah!  Emperor's Finest; certainly, the Emperor's Finest Fuck-ups."  Jax followed up with a slew of other insults denouncing the honor of the entire Blood Angels chapter.  Yet more missiles were aimed at the Valkyrie as Grim had to yank and juke the gunship all about to avoid the incoming fire.  Titus grabbed a heavy bolter and shot down all of the missiles from the back of the compartment where a hatch should be.
Jax switched channels on the vox caster, hailing anyone else who could answer.  Eventually, someone did.  "Left-tenant Carpenter here; we heard your call for help.  We'll draw the Space Marines' fire away from you, sir."
"May the Emperor be with you, Lieutenant," Jax replied.
The Valkyrie opened up with every gun it had causing a hole to the outside to be blown in the wall.  A prolonged boost to lose anybody else, and the group was free of the hive city.  As they headed to the highest parts of the hive, they couldn't help but notice the massive Imperator-class Titan firing its weapons on the city.
After a brief discussion they deemed the best course of action was to head to the armoury first to prepare to assault the titan.  A few brief minutes later, the Valkyrie headed for a final approach to the armoury runway.  But, a group of Space Marines was already waiting for them.

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